Guys........It's Me, Stars......and, Well....Ive been Having Serious problems lately. To Start, I am More Cranky, Irritable, and Depressed. I can't focus, and the tiniest thing could upset me. My mood swings are increasing in frequency, andI'm starting the feel the Stress of Change. See, My dad and Grandma thought I wasn't "Normal" Enough, so they decided to change so many things about me. Getting up earlier, No chewing on things, no staying up in my room, having to do conversation, making My room brighter, Basicly, Taking all the things that made me feel like me. I barely have anytime on here and It Stresses me out Because I feel me on here, And I feel As if that feeling is fading. Im...Im just a nervous Wreck At the moment to be honest. Money Problems, EMotional Problems, Family Problems, all in less than three weeks? This is the most .......Nnnnggh..I'm Getting to the point Were I don't think I can Keep doing this anymore. Doesn't help the fact I get jealous of someone else every damned 5 seconds. Then I get depressed, Then ANgry, Then Sad......Im...Im Just a Mess. ANd....I think I lie to myself saying that Everything will be AOK. but....To be honest. Im scared. I don't wanna feel like this. I want to be happy. FEEL needed. Feel Safe. Feel Relaxed. Feel Loved. Feel Secure. But I have none of those. And Im scared because I think I never honestly will again. Over and Over the same Scenario happens in my head, Pounding pounding in my head that I'll Fail AT whatever I do. I....Can' this. Not anymore. I need help, But don't No were to find it. Im in a room with windows in the ceiling showing happy skys but no ladder to reach it. I don't even know who I am anymore. I...I want help......I want to...To be me again...But I never will. I will never be happy. Never be happy....Never be wanted. Because Im me.....Thank you for listening. I don't know wether I'll come back or not. I don't feel very needed, ANyway

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